Sitting down is much more pleasurable this week. Saying good bye to the rectal itch of Division II football, the Great American Conference is one of the most relieving feelings I have had since Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin broke up. How was that Jewish goddess with a guy who looks he's about to grow a pedo-stache and cruise neighborhoods in a white van with a bowl of candy?

This week, conference play begins for the Gulf South Conference Five. Which also means one of these teams will not be playing a GSC game. Delta State fans in Mississippi, that is because five is an uneven number and only two teams can play per game.

Last week was another 5-0, T-bagging of the GAC for the GSC Five. Way to hold your own. Now go away. Forever. In recent news the GAC has announced they are changing their name to the WAAC; Weak Ass American Conference.

North Alabama and Delta State remain the top two ranked teams in the country after wins over Arkansas Tech and Arkansas-Monticello respectively. Valdosta State's quarterback drama added a new episode to the saga in a monumental comeback win. West Alabama dropped the hammer on Southern Arkansas, staying as a hot as any team in Super Region 2. And then there was West Georgia...where the hell did that 41 point performance come from?

Thursday 8:00 pm Delta State at North Alabama

This week the top two in the national polls will finally get broken up. This time next week either North Alabama or Delta State will drop depending on who wins what looks like another can't miss edition of GSC-TV Live.

The Statesmen return to the field where they lost the 2010 National Championship on a last second field goal. Expect this match up to be decided by less than a field goal.

It is as intriguing as it gets statistically. There will be a spaghetti western in Florence, Alabama this Thursday night with both of these teams slinging the ball around through the air. What it boils down to, is which gunslinger doesn't shoot themselves in the foot.

UNA is the top ranked pass offense in the GSC with 319.8 yards per game, with DSU behind them at number tow with 298.6 yards a contest. These two quarterbacks are nearly identical. Both two year starters who have been prone to mistakes but when on their game can light up a scoreboard like the best of the best in DII.

The Lion's Lee Chapple leads the completion percentage battle 65 percent to 61.2 percent. But the Statemen's Micah Davis edges him in yards per game with 289 versus 285 yards per contest. Davis has thrown for two more touchdowns (in one more game) with 15 so far. But Chapple has two less interceptions with six.

It's all about weapons and these two have plenty to distribute the ball too. Davis' surest thing on offense is receiver Chance Dennis. He gets most of Davis' targets and if this connection isn't there you can expect things to unravel for DSU.

Why would the surest weapon on a high powered offense not be there you ask? Because this week Chance Dennis enters....Janoris' Bong.

Janoris Jenkins, the most talented player in Division II football this year is setting his sites on Dennis this week. Expect next to nothing out of Dennis when Jenkins is on him. He will be packed, lit, inhaled and exhaled; only to be cashed out and sprinkled to the garbage.

With Davis' susceptibility to interceptions it would be smart to not ever look Jenkins way. Avoid him at all costs. When he comes to the line and sees Jenkins on a receiver, he should consider that his first read. Move on to the next. If you tests this guy in this big game with the TV cameras everywhere, you are asking him to put on a show.

In order for mistakes to happen a quarterback must be pressured. Davis falters under pressure. UNA's Marcus Dowtin has been a one man wrecking crew on defense. Dowtin is first in the conference in tackles and has forced three fumbles. Look for him to be involved in forcing turnovers, whether it's on the pass rush, knocking the ball loose or reading Davis in coverage.

Now on the other side of things, Chapple has a lot to deal with. Sure he has two receivers in Mo Milliam and Tristan Purifoy who average 72 plus yards per game and have combined for nine touchdowns this year. But they will also have to deal with corner backs who have been big this year in Dominique Davenport (eight passes defended, two interceptions) and Jerry Barnes (five passes defended, two interceptions).

Chapple will also be under pressure from one of the best pass rushes in the country. Robert Hogan, Robbie Mayers and Mark Hoskins (tied for second in GSC in tackles for loss) are two, three and four in the GSC in sacks this year. While Xavier Triplett is tied for second in the conference in tackles for loss, so expect him to bring a lot of pressure.

But can the Statesmen get their normal amount of pressure with UNA's Division I offensive line? These guys have only allowed eight sacks through six games.

There are only so many sure things in the world. You can look at these two teams and see the potential on either side. But North Alabama has more sure things heading into the game.

They run the ball better.
They are deeper on offense.
They protect the quarterback better.
They play better overall defense.

Prediction: North Alabama over Delta State 34-31

Saturday 3 pm West Alabama at Valdosta State

Last week I called my relationship with Valdosta State like Ronnie and Sammie on Jersey Shore. Yeah buddy, I was right as they did the opposite of my prediction and hammered Ouachita Baptist.

I said that two weeks ago I trashed our bedroom and triple kissed a bunch of fat chicks.

Enter Cayden Cochrane: Sammie's new pair of booty shorts that has me wanting her back.

Cochrane put together one of the most remarkable performances in recent memory last week. The Oklahoma transfer went 20 of 29 for 424 yards and four touchdowns.
But can we believe in Cochrane as the guy now?

He came into VSU's camp this year and has had to learn the offense, while being used sparingly throughout the first half of the year. But this is a VSU program that has played eight different quarterbacks since 2007. All of them at one point looked like the savior. Cochrane has all of the skills but it's going to have to be a wait and see approach for me before believing.

We'll find out right away if last week was a fluke or not. Because Cochrane is facing the GSC's top ranked defense in pass efficiency. Quarterbacks are completing just 53 percent of their passes against the Tigers this year. With a playoff spot on the line, this should be interesting.

The combination of quality coverage and pass rush by UWA is remarkable. Their linebackers can do everything; stop the run and cover receivers. This could possibly be the most balanced defense when it comes to all areas, in the GSC. Deon Lacey and Gabe Poe will be everywhere this week; especially with a final chance to head to the post season up for grabs.

These two teams are rightfully battling for the third playoff spot out of the GSC. They are also alarmingly similar. They are separated by less than 10 yards in average total offense per game and total defense per game.

Where we have two opposite entities comes in running the football and stopping the run. UWA is a run first offense with the best running back in the conference in Matthew Willis. Willis enters this week averaging an unreal 6.1 yards a carry and 113 yards per game.

VSU is ranked second in the conference in stopping the run at 107 yards per game. But it looks like Willis will get his. He always does. And the more Willis touches the ball, the less Kyle Caldwell has to do at quarterback.

Caldwell is winning and throwing touchdown passes but he's not very efficient. Last week he went 12 of 21 for 200 yards and two scores and the week before was 13 of 22 for 110 and three scores. It's some of the oddest lines to judge a quarterback on.

He doesn't complete a lot of passes. The ones he does complete aren't for a lot of yards. But he's going to throw it in the red zone and score. Just completing 57 percent of his passes this year, a quality VSU secondary should be able to force some turnovers.

Blazer corner backs Matt Pierce and Alex Webster are tied for first in the GSC in passes defended with an interception a piece. The biggest reason they and Ryan Smith, who has two picks this year, have thrived in the secondary is the pass rush of Lawrence Virgil.

This guy has developed into the most dominant pass rusher in the conference as a sophomore. He is too big to be that fast. Since moving from offensive line in high school to tight end as a freshman last year and now a defensive lineman, he has become a force. Through his first six games Virgil four sacks and two forced fumbles. Lookout Kyle Caldwell.

How well Virgil and the secondary team to disrupt Caldwell and his big play connection Gerald Worsham will be the biggest key to this game. If they can limit Worsham from breaking free they will walk away with a win and a step closer to a playoff spot.

With him averaging a 83 receiving yards, 6.3 receptions and a touchdown every week; it's easier said than done.

Prediction: Valdosta State over West Alabama 21-20

Saturday 2 pm St. Augustine's at West Georgia

I tried to be a good columnist and look at St. Augustine's statistics to figure them out. But however they are organized was one of the most annoying looking stats I have ever seen in my life. For that reason alone I don't take them seriously.

Who sets their stats up on a per game basis and without doing the math for me? I have a broadcast journalism degree. I got a D in Math Modeling...basically if you were a mathematical moron you took Math Modeling. I'm not going to sit here and calculate everything based off their antiquated stat machine. But here is what we know:

They are 2-4 with losses against any decent teams they have faced. SAC has beaten a 2-4 Catawba squad and Lincoln University, a school from the Northeast. I'm willing to bet, like most people they haven't seen a game changer like Emmanuel Taylor.

Taylor finally had his breakout game I had been calling for for weeks. He is a one man show and it's worth watching when he is on his game. He ran the ball 22 times last week for 114 yards and three touchdowns will going seven of 15 for 92 yards in the passing game.

Look I'm a huge fan of the three running backs West Georgia has. I have made it very known that I have a man-crush on Yusuf Holloway and think he is underutilized. Denarious Appling is more than just a return man to me and I think can be a number one receiver. And guys like Arkeem French, VJ Hunt could be under the radar complimentary play makers.

But the reality is, in order for UWG to win they must let their most talented player make plays. They have to let Taylor do his thing. Let him run around and find openings, because he is just too tough to contain.

He can't continue to run like he did last week when he plays a GSC team. But it could work this week against a lowly St. Augustine's squad. If UWG wants him to become more complete, utilizing those running backs on screens could be huge as well as developing a rapport with a slot receiver. Both of those things would get his completion rate, passing yards and confidence to pass up.

If not...just keep doing your thing. Run around, cause chaos and make big plays.

I'd expect a lot of them this week.

Prediction: West Georgia over St. Augustine's 28-14